Love is a biological event as much as an emotional one. Armand DiMele walks through the full arc of attraction, from the mental state you bring to a first meeting, to the pheromones and immune-system signals that drive desire, to the oxytocin and dopamine that sustain long-term bonds. Knowing the science, he argues, makes us more compassionate lovers.
Passion, technique, and emotional honesty are all part of good sex, argues Dr. Judy Kuriansky, a veteran sex therapist and protege of Masters and Johnson. She and Armand DiMele, joined by Stephanie D’Ambra, LCSW, debate Schnarch’s raw-desire model against Kuriansky’s view that intimacy is a skill built through practice, gestalt techniques, and her three A’s: acceptance, acknowledgment, and appreciation.
Why do we turn people and needs into abstract objects? Armand DiMele argues that objectification is a defense against vulnerability, whether it shows up as racial dehumanization, sexual fetish, or the jealous conviction that no one can be trusted. Callers trace these patterns back to childhood wounds.
Getting what you want is impossible when you don’t know who you are. Dale Goldstein, author of “Heart Work,” joins Armand DiMele to walk through his nine-step process for locating buried feelings in the body, grieving unmet childhood needs, and uncovering the authentic self beneath years of numbness and distraction.
Why does desire so rarely move us the way pain does? Armand DiMele and Christine Ulrich, a molecular biologist turned certified life coach, dig into the mechanics of change, exploring how coaches use whole-life assessment, probing questions, and pattern recognition to help clients reach goals they cannot reach alone.
What makes a desire toxic? Armand DiMele takes listener calls to explore how ordinary wants become compulsions, tracing the fears and suppressed anger underneath behaviors like compulsive exercise, procrastination, and the need to be desired. Co-host Deborah Hillman joins throughout.
Why did romance evolve at all? Armand DiMele argues that human courtship rituals grew directly from a biological turning point: females hiding estrus to survive early pregnancies. From firefly flash patterns to candlelight dinners, he traces how that ancient adaptation shaped the whole vocabulary of seduction.
Sexual fantasy is a creative workaround for deep psychological inhibition. Dr. Michael Bader, author of “Male Sexuality,” joins Armand to explain how childhood guilt, the fear of hurting others, and the loss of selfhood quietly kill desire, and why “healthy ruthlessness” is actually essential to arousal.
Money functions less as a tool than as a drug and a mirror for inner emptiness. Armand DiMele traces the psychology of wealth from Depression-era frugality to credit-card excess, arguing that arguments about money are always really about love, and that happiness cannot be purchased.
