We know what makes a good life, so why don’t we do it? Armand DiMele walks through the core patterns of self-defeating behavior, from denial and counterfactual thinking to procrastination and perfectionism, drawing on research by psychologist Dan Newhart to explain how self-sabotage builds gradually, often invisibly.
Denial is not weakness but an evolved survival tool, and Armand DiMele breaks down its many forms: denial of fact, responsibility, impact, awareness, and cycle. He connects this mechanism to addiction, overeating, abusive relationships, and even the subprime mortgage collapse, then works through caller stories to show how denial operates from the inside.
Armand DiMele and Dr. Kent Robertshaw, MD, Psychiatrist, examine why people lock away unbearable pain rather than face it, how children assign themselves blame for disasters and abuse, and why denial of death costs us empathy for suffering near and far.
Why do people lie to themselves, and what does that cost them? Armand DiMele and guests Dr. Kent Robertshaw, MD and Stephanie D’Ambra, LCSW explore how shame, unmet needs, and fear of self-examination keep people stuck in dysfunctional patterns, and why honest self-reflection is the foundation of real change.
Most people enter therapy not to change but to get better at what they already do. Armand DiMele introduces the concept of “criminal intention,” the hidden, often dark strategies we developed as children to survive, and shows how recognizing them in love, friendship, and work is the real engine of personal change.
