Keyword: defensiveness

Strategies for Getting Through Life November 12, 2014

Host: Armand DiMeleGuests: Ben Starr, Giullian Gioiello

Everyone develops a strategy for getting through life, and most of them form in childhood. Armand DiMele, joined by co-hosts Ben Starr and Giullian Gioiello, maps out the recurring patterns: the beauty-seeker, the easygoing half-asleep type, the controller who trusts no one, the dramatic emotional type. Understanding someone’s strategy, rather than judging it, is the path to genuine connection.

Why We Fear Getting Close October 4, 2011

Host: Armand DiMele

Loving others feels good, so why do so many people sabotage it? Armand DiMele traces the roots of intimacy fear to conditional childhood love, laying out the defense mechanisms, control dynamics, blame patterns, and victim roles that quietly wreck adult relationships. A co-host named Linda and callers add their voices.

The Roots of Belligerence December 1, 2010

Host: Armand DiMele

Beneath belligerence lies fear, not rage. Armand DiMele and co-host Linda trace the signs of belligerent behavior from nervous hyperactivity through verbal attacks, explaining the hormonal drivers and why people cannot think their way out of the state. Callers share real conflicts, and yoga is offered as a practical path back to calm.

Surviving Verbal Attack July 10, 2008

Host: Armand DiMele

When someone screams at you, your body responds the way animals do under threat: freeze, flee, fight, or shut down. Armand DiMele maps these survival instincts onto relationship conflict and proposes a fresh alternative, reframing a partner’s rage as illness rather than a personal attack.

Fear Behind Every Difficult Behavior Undated

Host: Armand DiMeleGuests: Roberta Maria Atti

Almost all erratic, confusing, or harmful human behavior traces back to fear. Armand DiMele and co-host Roberta Maria Atti walk through the evolutionary roots of fear, its biochemistry, and how recognizing that someone is frightened rather than attacking changes everything about how we respond to them.

Why Couples Fight So Ugly Undated

Host: Armand DiMele

Reasonable people become their worst selves with their partners. Armand draws on John Gottman’s research to explain why couples slide into contempt, rage, and stonewalling, and offers practical tools like the five-to-one positivity ratio and the “pause clause” to break destructive cycles.