Every judgment hides an unmet need. Tom Bond, executive director and lead facilitator for Marshall Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication work, joins Armand DiMele to explain how shifting from blame to feelings and needs can transform stuck, accusatory arguments into genuine connection.
Reasonable people become their worst selves with their partners. Armand draws on John Gottman’s research to explain why couples slide into contempt, rage, and stonewalling, and offers practical tools like the five-to-one positivity ratio and the “pause clause” to break destructive cycles.
Blame, defensiveness, and stonewalling quietly destroy relationships. Armand DiMele lays out seven practical communication guidelines, from expecting defensiveness when starting hard conversations to replacing accusatory “you” statements with “I” language, with research on attraction and partner selection woven throughout.
Armand DiMele maps out what to do when someone you care about lashes out unfairly. Rather than fighting back, he argues for showing genuine hurt, explaining why tears disarm anger more effectively than counter-attack, and why most rage burns itself out in about 22 minutes if you stop feeding it.
